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Is putting everyone else first costing you your power, your dreams and your happiness?

 

playing small

 

Wow. Something powerful is stirring. Can you feel it? Me and the women around me are really being called powerfully now to set clear boundaries, ask for what we want, declare our intuitive truths and find a way to serve others at the same time as serving ourselves.

 

I’m seeing it everywhere. My own personal shift reflected externally perhaps? Or simply a collective shift I’m aware of. I’m attuned to the collective energies and shifts of our sisterhood and am often the voice of them. I know that now. And so here is the latest….

 

As women when we start to awaken and our hearts open, we tap into a profound unconditional love. This immense love filtered through our childhood ‘good girl’, people-pleasing, self-sacrificing Mother Teresa programming causes us to give and give and give with selfless abandon. And that’s just it, we abandon ourselves. Then wonder why we end up burnt out, exhausted, broke and unwell (guilty as charged!).

 

Part of the rise of the awakening woman is a rise into her authentic power. To do this we need to look at our patterns of over-giving and our misconceptions about what it means to be loving and spiritual. It is time. We are being called into our greatness and that starts with loving ourselves, coming back to ourselves, reclaiming ‘lost’ energy, defining healthy boundaries and no longer seeing ourselves or others as small and helpless.

 

I’m part of a small sacred circle of women locally. It is a closed group. Just for us. A soulful mastery circle (or miss-try circle) if you like. We too are declaring clearer and clearer boundaries. We met up the other night and it was powerful. We shone a light on how each of us now needs to break old patterns of people-pleasing, to reclaim our power, to say NO to unhealthy relationships and habits and to drop the resistance so we can open to receiving what it is we truly want.

 

It’s time to look at what is really working and what really isn’t.

 

Time to look at patterns you are stuck in and be honest with yourself about what you are getting out of it rather than playing the victim and believing you are powerless to change anything.

 

It’s time to look at what being a spiritual and compassionate woman means. Does it mean being a total doormat and ignoring how you’re being disrespected? Or does it mean being compassionate to YOURSELF too and realising that you cannot fulfil your purpose and be who you came here to be if you stay in unhealthy relationships and keep giving your power away.

 

“That’s easier said than done” will no longer cut it. EVERYTHING is easier said than done. Change takes work.

 

It’s time to love yourself and stand up for your dreams, gifts and purpose as you would a mother lion protecting and defending her cubs.

 

In our work lives it’s time to stop being polite and seeing our clients as small. Particularly if you’re a coach, healer or mentor. YOU standing in your power with your own strong boundaries around your time, finances, terms and conditions and personal self-esteem is exactly what WILL empower the other person, even if they react and project at first. You are calling them into their higher self.

 

We sensitive, spiritual, loving types are afraid of our own power. We need to sort that out and be willing to fight for what we believe in. We need to be willing to fight as much for ourselves as we do for others or we’ll always be frustrated, exhausted and feeling as if we’re living a half life, or someone else’s life.

 

When I discovered in my theological research over the years that it is said that Christ fought with a sword as much as he cried with compassion, that changed something in me.

 

Being the Goddess isn’t about being a doormat.

 

It’s about HEART FIRE. It’s about a love so powerful for this world and your passion and purpose that you are no longer willing to compromise.

 

How you love is changing. Your love becomes something that is no longer willing to allow those around you to play small. It becomes a love that will not allow YOU to play small. It becomes fierce compassion.

 

Change is scary. Growth is always scary. Challenging old patterns that keep you comfy but small is scary. If you’re not feeling some kind of fear then you aren’t growing or really living. And I don’t mean the kind of fear designed primally to keep you safe from wild animals. I mean the kind of fear that is mixed with exhilaration but which perhaps you’ve avoided for so long you can’t feel the excitement anymore.

 

Even if you’re flat-on-the-floor exhausted by life (as I have been during two major dark nights of the soul myself) you can make a silent courageous choice that from this moment onwards you will put your own needs, health, wellbeing and dreams first.

 

Even if you have children it’s time to learn how essential it is to put your needs first. On every aircraft the emergency instructions to parents (especially Mothers) is to make sure you put the oxygen mask on yourself first. Why? Because if you don’t, you can’t save your children or help those around you. Everyone dies.

 

So my lovelies. Are you feeling it? 

Are you seeing this shift show up in your life or business right now?

How are you being tested and pushed to surrender and stand up for yourself?

Do share in the comments below.

 

 

Lots of love,
kim signature copy

 

 

 

 

Comments

  1. I am having a hard time with gratitude, and many others have things worse than I. How do I put that together with taking care of myself first?

    • Kimberley Jones says:

      Hi Debbie, that’s a good question. ‘Thankyou Therapy’ can help turn everything around. Just take baby steps and even if you don’t believe it at first you will gradually start to rewire your brain, raise your vibration and start to open your heart so you can start to practice self-care. So ‘Thankyou Therapy’ is simple. At the end of each day take a few minutes and list 3 things that happened that day you are grateful for. Things may be hard and you may be struggling in life. I’m sorry if that’s the case. This doesn’t invalidate your struggle. Just add this on at the end of the day. Make it something new each day if possible. Write in a journal if it helps. When I had been through hell and lost everything I didn’t think it would be possible to ever feel good again. I felt awful and very sorry for myself. But the process of thinking of 3 things each day, however hard at first, gradually made me look at my life differently. My heart could open to good again and THEN I could find the energy to start practising self-care. Hope this helps Debbi. Keep me posted. – K <3

  2. Mellisa Holme says:

    I always love these blogs thank you Kimberley .xxxxxxxx

  3. Great post Kimberley . Thank you.
    Your last comment was particularly poignant for me.
    My daughter has lived with an eating disorder for the past fifteen years. I had to make the heart rending choice to let her go with love and trust. The fear of my beloved choosing not to live was enormous. I knew that my child’s life was not mine to choose. Thank fully my gorgeous daughter chose to take responsibility for her self and her life. Our relationship is evolving and I have an inner strength and absolute love that I may not have realised had I not been through this experience . Loads of love Sarah X

  4. Right on! I always receive your emails when i need them most. Best reminder to help me stay on the path. Thank you so much for what your doing kimberley

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